What my skin taught me about doing less

I remember walking into work one day and watching a colleague's face say, "OMG, what has happened to your face?".  Not a word was spoken, but the expression said it all.

Good question. I had no idea.

I'd had a stressful few months, I was perimenopausal. And I was enjoying testing my limits with curry. What I thought were a few pimples had turned into something that looked and felt very different, and I did what a lot of us do. I assumed it was pimples and went after it.

More was not the answer

I tried exfoliants. Then actives. When that didn't work, I tried stronger ones. In my head the logic was simple: something was wrong, so I needed something more powerful to fix it.

It took a doctor's visit to find out those weren't pimples at all - it was rosacea. I'd spent weeks throwing aggressive products at skin that was already inflamed and reactive, which is about the worst thing you can do.

The things I could and couldn't change

Once I had a diagnosis, I dialled back the curry. That one was easy enough to act on, even if I grumbled about it.  The rest was harder. I was perimenopausal, and there wasn't much I could do about the hot and cold flashes at that point. Stress was the same. People will tell you to reduce it, and that's easier said than done when life isn't cooperating.

Then came the medication. I had an allergic reaction to it, and my skin got worse. It went rough in patches, and it stung whenever a liquid touched it, including water. Even washing my face hurt.

All I wanted to do was hide. I covered it with makeup, which is its own kind of misery on skin that's already sore. My skin did calm down eventually, but it took months, and my confidence took a knock too.

Back to basics

After the reaction, I saw a dermatologist. Her advice was refreshingly simple: go back to basics. A gentle cleanser and moisturiser. That was it.

I had unintentionally upset my skin barrier.  After weeks of escalating, being told to do less felt almost too easy. But it worked, slowly, and it changed how I think about skincare.  

Looking back, that was cleanse and seal. Clean the skin gently, then protect it so it can get on with healing. Nothing in between.

How it shaped Tatawai

That experience still influences how I formulate. Tatawai is built around three steps: cleanse, support, seal. Cleanse gently. Support the skin with hydration and calming ingredients when it needs it. Seal it in with a barrier-supporting moisturiser.

The “when it needs it” matters. Some days, or for some skin, support isn’t necessary, and cleanse and seal is enough. A routine shouldn’t ask skin to do more than it needs to, and that includes the number of steps.

So I use restraint with active ingredients. I listen closely to how a product feels during testing, not just what it's meant to do. And I ask a question I wish I'd asked myself years ago: does this support the skin, or is it asking the skin to cope with more than it needs to?

The skin and brain are in constant conversation. When your skin is struggling, it affects how you feel about yourself, and I understand that much better now than I did the morning that colleague looked at me.

If your skin is stinging, flaring or just not behaving, it's worth seeing your doctor or a dermatologist before you reach for another product. I wish I had.

Suz is the founder of Tatawai Botanicals, a Canterbury-based skincare brand formulated for sensitised and reactive skin.